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Who is Artie Lange?
American actor, stand-up comedian and radio personality Arthur Steven ‘Artie’ Lange Jr. was born in Livingston, New Jersey USA, on 11 October 1967, meaning that Libra’s his zodiac sign. He’s appeared in 37 movies and TV series, but is probably still known best for playing various characters in 42 episodes of the comedy series “Mad TV”, which was created by Adam Small and Fax Bahr, and starred Debra Wilson and Michael McDonald. It’s a comedy show based on “Mad Magazine”, the series aired from 1995 through 2016, and won 16 of its 89 award nominations.
Education and early life
Artie was raised in Livingston alongside his sister Stacey, by their father Arthur Lange Sr. who was a general contractor of German descent, and mother Judy (nee Caprio) who was a housewife and was of Italian descent; Artie’s sister’s today a successful fashion designer. Artie was two weeks old when his father stood trial for keeping $200,000 in counterfeit money for a loan shark, but he wasn’t given jail time, apparently because the judge felt sorry for him.
Artie studied at Union High School and was mostly into playing baseball during his time there, but had poor grades and thus had to attend summer school. He matriculated in 1985 and was in the same year arrested for attempted bank robbery; Artie passed a note to the teller, which said that he had a gun and wanted $50,000 – this was Artie’s joke, as he wanted to impress his girlfriend, however, upon seeing that the teller had become serious, he threw the note away and told her that it was only a joke. The teller still activated the silent alarm, which led to Artie’s arrest; he was charged with disorderly conduct, had to do 25 hours of community service, and was ordered to pay $500 in court fees.
He enrolled at Seton Hall University in 1985, but soon became bored with studying; on 18 October of the same year, Arthur Sr. fell off a ladder, broke his back and became a quadriplegic. Artie then found a job to help his family financially – his father died from an infection in 1990; Artie believes that one of his father’s ‘crazy’ friends might had helped him commit suicide.
Roles in TV series
Artie’s debut TV series appearance was in the 1986 episode “Ships in the Night” of the comedy “Tough Cookies”, and he spent the following years focused on performing stand-up comedy; his debut was at The Improv in Hell’s Kitchen, Manhattan and he then took acting lessons for a month at New Jersey’s HB Studio. Artie only quit the lessons because he was no longer able to afford them. He spent the year 1991 working as a longshoreman, then in September 1992 became a taxi driver in New York City.
From 1999 through 2001, he played Artie Henderson in 42 episodes of the critically acclaimed comedy “Norm”, which starred Laurie Metcalf and Norm MacDonald, and was created by Bruce Helford. It follows a former ice hockey player who’s been banned from the sport for life because of tax evasion and gambling, while he now also has to do community service; the series won two of its three award nominations.
In 2004, Artie voiced one of the lead characters Turbo, in six episodes of the animated action comedy “Game Over”, which also starred Rachel Dratch and Elizabeth Daily, and was created by David Goetsch and David Sacks. It follows a family of four in a video game world, and the series won a 2004 Casting Society of American Artios Award for Best Casting for Animated Voice Over, Television. The remainder of the decade saw Artie win roles in the comedy “Entourage”, another comedy “Rescue Me”, and the short animated comedy “The Mighty B!” (voice role).
Most recently, from 2017 through 2019, Artie starred in 11 episodes of the comedy “Crashing”, which also starred Pete Holmes who created the series; it follows a comedian from New York whose wife has just left him.
Season 3 of Crashing done! I wanna thank the crew who I call Houdini cause Their names escape me. I pre paid hair & m/up chicks to do my wake! It’s gonna rock! Former HS intern Grillo is gonna bartend. He’s promised Tracy Millman free booze! If I don’t show up it ain’t my fault! pic.twitter.com/hCZt5kfJKN
— Artie Lange (@artiequitter) August 8, 2018
Roles in movies
Artie’s debut film role was playing Judas in the 1993 comedy “Basic Values: Sex, Shock and Censorship in the ‘90s”, which starred Greg Evigan and Kimberly Beck, and was directed by David Jablin. It follows the life of newswoman Fay Sommerfield, and the film was nominated for three awards.
Some of Artie’s following roles were in the 1997 comedy “What’s Your Sign?”, the 1998 comedy “Dirty Work” and another 1998 comedy “King of New York”. The following year saw him play Wally in the popular romantic comedy “Lost & Found”, which starred Sophie Marceau and David Spade, and was directed by Jeff Pollack. It follows Dylan Rampsey who’s kidnapped his beautiful French neighbor’s dog so that he could become a hero by returning it – the movie was nominated for a 1999 Stinkers Bad Movie Award for Most Botched Comic Relief.
Artie could then have been seen appearing in the mystery thriller “The 4th Floor”, the romantic comedy “The Bachelor” and the crime action thriller “Puppet”, all released in 1999. In 2003, he played Booker in the evergreen comedy “Old School”, which starred Vince Vaughn, Will Ferrell and Luke Wilson, and was written and directed by Todd Phillips. It follows three friends as they’re starting a fraternity, and the film was nominated for five awards. Some of Artie’s following roles were in the drama “God Has a Rap Sheet”, the comedy “Mail Order Bride”, and the adventure family comedy “Elf”, all released in 2003.
The year 2006 saw him play the lead character Artie DeVanzo in the sports comedy “Beer League”, which also starred Anthony DeSando and Ralph Macchio, and was written and directed by Frank Sebastiano; it follows a softball team who are about to be kicked out of the local league unless they improve their game – the film won one of its two award nominations.
Artie’s since appeared in only a couple of movies, with his three most recent roles being in the 2013 short biographical comedy “Archie Black”, the 2016 short drama “MIME: Trapped in a Box Starring Artie Lange” and the 2017 comedy “Last Convict Standing”.
Other credits
Artie received special thanks for the 2003 short animated action series “Red vs. Blue”, the 2011 documentary comedy film “Nick DiPaolo: Raw Nerve” and the 2013 comedy movie “As Cool as I Am”.
He has nine writing and eight producing credits, while some of his most notable written work has perhaps been in 2009, the short documentary comedy movie “Who is Mike Bocchetti?” and the comedy film “Artie Lange: Jack and Coke”, and the 2014 comedy TV special “Artie Lange: The Stench of Failure”.
Some of Artie’s recent talk-show appearances have been in “Hot Ones”, “The Joe Rogan Experience” and “Dark Side of Comedy”.
Drug addiction and imprisonment
Artie became addicted to cocaine in the first half of the ‘90s, and his singing bonus for the show “Mad TV” only further fueled his addiction; he ran out of cocaine in November 1995, and then attempted suicide by downing a bottle of whiskey and taking ‘a bunch of pills’. Artie had left a suicide note to his sister and mother, but survived and then completed a rehab program.
He returned to using cocaine in August 1996, and was arrested in November of the same year after being ‘too drugged’ on the set of “Mad TV”; he spent a couple of days in Los Angeles County Jail, but wasn’t tried in court. He spent some time in a psychiatric hospital in January 1997, and then fell into depression.
Artie attempted suicide for the second time on 2 January 2010, when he stabbed himself nine times in the abdomen, cut his wrists and drank bleach; he was found by his mother, and was taken to a psychiatric ward following surgery.
Artie was arrested for being in possession of drug paraphernalia, cocaine and heroin on 12 March 2017; he was re-arrested on 12 December after failing to appear in court. He was rushed to a hospital on 7 July 2017, and the doctors revealed that he was only hours away from dying. Artie pleaded guilty to being in possession of 80 bags of heroin on 15 December 2017, and then entered another rehab program; he left the program in January 2018, and began using again a couple of months later.
He was arrested on 12 May 2018 after speeding and having heroin in his possession, then again for being in possession of a controlled substance on 30 January 2019, and yet again on 21 May; Artie was released from prison on 10 June, after having served 21 days.
He announced on 30 January 2020 that he had been sober for a year – so far no reported relapse!
Love life and relationships
There are only two women whom Artie’s been with, that his fans know about. He and American non-celebrity woman Dana Cironi were in a relationship from 2002 through 2006; Dana’s been featured in a number of YouTube videos, in some of which she’s giving interviews about her relationship with Artie, speaking about how she handled his drug addiction, and how his suicide attempts impacted his family and friends.
He met another non-celebrity American woman, Adrienne Ockrymiek at a tanning salon in 2009, and the two became engaged in 2012, however, they split in 2014 before exchanging vows.
Artie’s yet to speak about other women whom he’s perhaps dated; he seems to be unattached as of June 2023, hasn’t married and doesn’t have children.
Interesting facts and hobbies
Artie purchased a penthouse in Hoboken, New Jersey in 2001 for $620,000, and has since been living there; he also bought a summer home for $2.5 million in Toms River, New Jersey in 2008, but sold it in 2016.
Artie doesn’t think of himself as a liberal, but does support gay rights and unions.
He began selling his vanilla and chocolate cupcakes Artie Lange in 2007, through the New York City bakery Crumbs; all the proceeds from selling his cupcakes go to a HIV/AIDS charity.
Artie was diagnosed with diabetes in the first half of the 2010s, and has to take insulin injections on a daily basis.
He’s a huge fan of actors Robert De Niro and Al Pacino, and has watched the 1972 movie “The Godfather” numerous times. During an episode of “The Howard Stern Show”, when both Artie and the mentioned movie’s director Francis Ford Coppola were guests, Artie told Francis that he could recite the entire film, and asked him to choose a scene. Francis chose the scene when Carlo Rizzi and Michael Corleone spoke before Rizzi’s assassination, and Artie was indeed able to recite it with only two minor mistakes.
A DNA test has shown that Artie’s 24 per cent American Indian.
Artie’s published three books: “Too Fat to Fish” in 2009, “Crash and Burn” in 2014, and “Wanna Bet? A Degenerate Gambler’s Guide to Living on the Edge” in 2018.
He’s a great impersonator of Henry Hill, Notorious B. I. G. and Larry Flynt.
Artie once competed in the game-show “Cash Cab”, and won $2,100.
Height, eyes and wealth
Artie’s age is 55. He has brown eyes and black hair, is 5ft 9ins (1.75m) tall and weighs around 165lbs (74kgs).
Artie’s net worth’s been estimated at over $1 million, as of June 2023.
